Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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