And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
