my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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