As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
