I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize