I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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