At least make sure they are 18
Why
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
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