Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
