who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Randomize
