Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize