So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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