even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize