we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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