Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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