Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
