I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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