He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
