bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize