on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Randomize
