hell yes lets make some ravioli
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
