We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
whose parrot is this?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
