Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
