K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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