do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
