Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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