You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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