Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I got inside last night via doggy door
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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