carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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