i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize