they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Ladies don't puke and tell
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize