After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
