They should really pass out barf bags in church
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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