I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
