The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
