well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
