My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
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