just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
