Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
