they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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