its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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