i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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