real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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