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I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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