whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize