the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
