But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
