I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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