I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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