we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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