I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
